13 Comments

The answer is Costco. The answer is always Costco.

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Nice pitch. Costco installed one of its outlets within 5 miles of my place. My subscriber temptation pinkies are twitching.

Correction: 13 mins @ 5.3 miles according to our Google masters.

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It’s addicting Costco is. Watch out!

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You're a hoot! I love hoots! Still laughing!

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Funny AF. I LOLed. Did you lay it on Funny Times? If they don't take it they are crazy.

One sure way to get to sleep is to be tired. Works for me every time. Being drunk is a reasonable backup plan, but not stoned: that never works.

But a "good night's" sleep? I don't know what that is. Does six hours count? That's the most I can hope for at a stretch. I'm like Kutusov in War and Peace.

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I’m sure I gave it to them, I bury them with pieces every two months or so. I never sleep more then a few hours at a time, arthritis seems to that. I’m doomed.

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That's similar to why I wake up. I don’t have arthritis but I'm old so everything hurts.

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Always be closing on the three S brands- Sealy, Serta and Simmons. (Those are the three leading mattresses brands, if I remember all those TV ads correctly...).

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What did YOU do? Click on 'add-to-my-shopping-basket' in the wrong tab while shopping on Amazon and get the wrong seller. Anyway, I've done that maybe twice that I remember, but with the returns policies, that over time become more like a maze of gotchas, I usually navigate through the red-tape.

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I clicked on a drink I like once and ended up paying $32 for one bottle LOLOL Gotta actually read.

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<rimshot>

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I need a new mattress and I’m so confused. And why are there so many choices? People only buy mattresses every 10 years or so, yet there is a mattress store on every corner and online ads in the thousands if Siri even hears you say “sleep”. It’s not like toilet paper. And what’s with the return policy? Like you can package them up and take them to the local post office? We need a mattress advisor to help navigate.

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It is bizarre. The store where I got my current mattress is always completely empty, it looks like a drug front.

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